emergingfree

Christian and Socially-Conscious…One Woman's Expression

Archive for the tag “relationships”

Wicked People

There was a time when I thought all people were good people.  Then I thought, some people were troubled.  Now I understand, there are those who are evil.  Sometimes, they wear sheep’s clothing.   Other times, they do not.  Beware!

duck-looking-around

This man [Jesus of Nazareth] was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross.  —Acts 2:23

It was not easy for me to accept the notion that wicked people exist.  If in a group, I would be the one trying to understand why one person would intentionally hurt another, why one person would intentionally be cruel to another, why one person would intentionally break the spirit of another—particularly when the two profess the same faith as I.

“How could this be,” I would think.

Rest

Where is the love?

I would search to identify the why, not the wicked.  [You will know them by their fruit, I have come to rely upon.]  Truth is, some are wicked.  They are not crazy.  They are not demented.  They are not touchedThey are evil.  It is spiritual and as my spiritual awareness heightens, so does my respect for the spiritual realm.

Maturity has allowed me to accept people for who they are—not how they are with me.  There is always a spiritual conversation occuring, even when not conscious to us.  Because of this, I constantly pray for discernment.

Woman Praying

Do not be deceived:  Wicked people will work with you when you are working for their purpose.  Such agreement may not be obvious to you (immediately, if ever).  Know your helpmates and their spiritual significance.  It is a matter of life or death.

 

Invisible Allies

One of the lessons I learned during my campaign run was to appreciate invisible allies.  I laugh about it now, as I reflect upon my growth in this area.  Truth is, not everyone who support you will cheer for you publicly, and not everyone who cheer for you publicly will care for you privately.

Ghost Scene

Later, Joseph of Arimathea asked Pilate for the body of Jesus.  Now Joseph was a disciple of Jesus, but secretly because he feared the Jews.  With Pilate’s permission, he came and took the body away.  He was accompanied by Nicodemus, the man who earlier had visited Jesus at night.  Nicodemus brought a mixture of myrrh and aloes, about seventy-five pounds.  Taking Jesus’ body, the two of them wrapped it, with the spices, in strips of linen.  This was in accordance to Jewish custom.  John 19: 38-40

Who cares for you, for your soul, when no one else is looking?  Who do you care for; who do you pray for; who do you call, text, or email to sincerely encourage when an audience is not around?  Do you hold it against people if you do not see their support?  To you, I share what I had to become conscious about and am still maturing in:

  • Do not lose focus on God or on your divine assignment;
  • He is working in you and He is working in others;
  • Know that He will provide for you, even in times when you do not see or understand; and
  • Remain open to receiving love from people, even after you have left the scene.

Invisible allies are not your enemy.  If revealed, don’t treat them as such!

 

Who Do You Say I Am?

Today I did something sooooooo incredibly awesome as a result of accepting an invitation to be a Guest Messenger at a church.  Listen to the message I delivered earlier today.  No worries—it’s less than 18 minutes. (LOL!)  I hope it is a blessing to you!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8YKJDy3sae4&feature=youtu.be

Those Lyrics

I ended my relationship with him because his music of preference degraded, devalued, and denounced women.  How did we get to this place?  When did I become his enemy?  Surely, he did not think of me as a friend!

“Oh, the lyrics are not about you,” he would say.

Ughhhhhh, my frustration rose with every point he missed.  Of course the lyrics are not about me specifically, but its collective implication is placed squarely upon my shoulders.  The weight is heavy.  The conversation is lacking.  Maybe if I were not a professional woman, I would not notice?  Maybe if my life did not require me to be in situations where I am the only one, I would not be bothered?  How have we gravitated from R-E-S-P-E-C-T to O-P-P?  Perplexed and tired, I ended the relationship.

If you are wondering, yes we are still friends—the one, he says, “that got away “.  What an interesting choice of words when considering the bondage his ideology would have placed me under.  Walking away, I was left wondering if he would ever know A Woman’s Worth.  I can only hope so, but I still don’t know.

peace

Unless empathetic, people only seem to understand “a thing” if it has a direct impact on them.  Have we become so desensitized that we only have empathy when catastrophes occur?  Don’t we know that by the time we see the physical manifestations of inequity, inequalities have already run rampant?  Many seem to think that if they do not have a dog in the fight, then the fight is simply theater.  “Get over it”, they say.  “It’s not that serious”, they insist while attempting to bully via shame.  “You are too sensitive”, they sing.  Their perspective, however, does not change your reality nor how such attitudes affect your life.

“Oh, the lyrics are not about you” become about me when I show up to defend someone in court and have to check a dude who calls me honey.  They become about me when I am in a meeting and the males are addressed by their respective titles and I am by my first name only.  They become about me when the salary being offered to me is less or when I am overlooked for a promotion, not because of my work product, but because of this rule that a man—and many times a white male—is simply worth more.  How could he not be worth more, right?  People like to do business with people like them and most big business deals are done between men—white, wealthy men.  Now, you know like I do that most people are not white and wealthy and male.  Yet, the oppression amongst those of us who are not continues to pit ally against ally.

Women Sitting Across From Each Other

Although at times slow to make mainstream rotation, songs empowering women are being written and played.  Their vehicle is not limited to the radio, but more readily seen in life.  So, what songs do you turn up…or turn off?  Are the lyrics being sung about you?  The big picture, most miss.

We’ve Met Before

Every now and again I meet someone who says something to me, about me, that captures my attention.  My spirit recognizes his or her identity immediately, yet oftentimes my head is puzzled.  What an interesting experience.  Has this ever happened to you?

YOU LOOK FAMILIAR……

Woman Looking in Mirror

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Jesus saw Nathanael approaching, he said of him, “Here is a true Israelite, in whom there is nothing false.”  “How do you know me?” Nathanael asked.  Jesus answered, “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree before Philip called you.”  Then Nathanael declared, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God; you are the King of Israel.”  Jesus said, “You believe because I told you I saw you under the fig tree.  You shall see greater things than that.”  He then asked, “I tell you the truth, you shall see heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending on the Son of Man.”  —John 1:47-51 

Woman Reading Bible

I am taking these divine encounters more seriously nowadays.  In years prior, they were simply light and fun because they came with an instant sense of comfort.  Trust was automatic.  I knew the person saw ME and I, in turn, recognized the person as Family.  As I grew in faith, I began to understand that which bonded us was greater than coincidence.  I realized that these meetings were significant.  What was light and fun began to feel heavy and now meaningfulEverything works together….

“With age comes wisdom,” they say.  Now, I am more conscious of how rare these meetings occur.  Now, I am very sensitive about understanding the purpose of our encounters—acknowledging that everything is spiritual.  Truth is, the more I grow in my faith, the more I desire to connect with the people God wants me to connect with.  We shall see greater!  We will do greater…together…because we believe!  Yes, I have grown to cherish these experiences, these relationships, these people………. these whom I’ve met before.

 

 

Betrayal From A Known Place

Have you ever disowned someone you loved, someone only months before you would fight for?  I have.  I could write story after story about broken relationships—things you would relate to—but I will spare you those narratives.  There is another point-of interest that captures my attention, an area of prayer where I am growing.

Peter replied, “Man, I don’t know what you’re talking about!”  Just as he was speaking, the rooster crowed.  The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter.  Then Peter remembered the word the Lord had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows today, you will disown me three times.”  And he went outside and wept bitterly.  —Luke 22:60-62

At the end of every year I review my relationships, particularly those with people I consider friends.  Several years ago, I discovered that I had developed a particular pattern with a “person”.  Each year, this “person” would change, but every year I would meet someone during the same part of the year.  We would be close from the jump as if we had known each other before, but by the year’s end we would not speak.  Isn’t that strange?  How could you be so close and within twelve months be so far apart?

peace

Once I realized that this happened year-after-year, I began to spot this “person”.  This awareness helped me in that at the end of the year I would note the situation causing the breakdown, but because I knew it would happen I was prepared for its occurrence.  The emotional sting I felt in preceding years was no longer there.  I simply moved on, never considering that that person would care enough to mourn.  Now, I am reconsidering my stance.  (Pray for me.)

Rest

The reality of life is, no one is perfect.  People will make mistakes straining relationships with even their closest loved ones.  I have made mistakes.  You have made mistakes.  We all have made them.  This understanding, however, leads me to my point of reconsideration.  Jesus knew Peter would betray Him and therefore prayed for him.

“Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat.  But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail.  And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” —Luke 22:31-32

Admittedly, there were many years when I identified this “person” and failed to pray over our relationships.  (Note, to pray for the “person” is different than praying over the “relationship”.  Both are necessary.)  This pains me really, but I thank God for growth.  I first had to learn to pay attention to divine relationships.  Then, I needed to understand how vital it is to constantly pray over them.  We have work to do!  In truth, nobody is happy about divine relationships being damaged but Satan.  Ah, but I have found the blessing in knowing betrayal from a known place so I will do better.  Will you?

Relationship Differences

Relationships, I never took them lightly;  Now, I am not sure if I can take them any more seriously.  Associations are the difference between life and death.  Who wants to LIVE?  I do!

Friends

Then Satan entered Judas, called Iscariot, one of the Twelve.  Luke 22:3

As a child, it was vital that I believed that my friends cared about my life.  As far as I was concerned, family –well– I was stuck with those people, so even if they got shady we would still be connected but friends –well– I could drop them and keep moving.  There would always be new friends to meet, right?  There are always people looking to laugh and have fun.  There are always people looking to connect.  Friends are just a hello away… or so I thought.

Without knowing it, I developed a hard-line habit of emotionally and (sometimes) physically detaching at the first hint of me questioning a friendship’s reliability.  Rarely would my friends question my change in behavior.  This lack of concern confirmed within me my right behavior.  Life went on.  The cycle continued.

Thank God for growth and grace!  As I began to understand me more, I began to understand what kinds of people I wanted to grow with.  As such, the more I understood my spiritual gifts and talents, the more I began to understand what kinds of people I needed to grow with.  I began to understand the difference and importance in having divine relationships versus those which are also great but are in fact spiritually secular.  (Note, sharing the same faith is not the lone criteria.)  I needed to find peace and clarity with knowing that there are numerous personalities and people who I can have fun and laugh with, spend time and play with, work and relax with, but divine relationships are appointed to build God’s kingdom and advance His purpose.  I needed to commit to live my faith with the people God assigns to sharpen me and I them for His purpose, one greater than us.  The more I stand in agreement with this, the more I find myself consciously and continuously praying for clarity and protection regarding these sacred relationships, as well as over myself.  Why?  Simply put, I believe.

Listen, we pray over people we do not know.  We pray over things that are transient.  We pray over solutions to problems and for cures to diseases and over prayer lists and over our churches and over our church Family, yet how many of us pray over our divine relationships?  How many of us know the differences between divine relationships and secular ones?  Note, there are differences.

Satan will try to enter anybody and anything following the Lord, even one of Jesus’ Twelve.  Make no mistake about it.  He will try to enter me and he will try to enter you.  Spiritual warfare is real.  We must do better with our journeymates.  A temporary distraction can lead to irreversible repair.

Walk In Truth

One day, after a staff meeting a much older attorney said to me, “You are different.”  I looked at her, not knowing what to say.  She continued, “I noticed that if someone says something that is not funny to you, you don’t laugh.  Others will laugh and say later it was not funny, but you won’t laugh.”  She went on to say, “I wish I could be like that.”

As I walked to my office, I thought about her observation.  It is interesting how on the surface, people will appear to be on the side of the majority yet have internal conflict.  It is also interesting how someone can long to be like you yet target you as their enemy.  Don’t take it personally.  Don’t take it lightly either.

Women Sitting Across From Each Other

When Jesus left there, the Pharisees and the teachers of the law began to oppose him fiercely and to besiege him with questions, waiting to catch him in something he might say.  —Luke 11:53-54

Why is it that some people will love and hate you for walking in your truth?  Why is there a “campaign” to find a flaw in those who may be perceived as perfect, but who do not profess to be?  What is gained by opposing someone who does a good work to better a people, when doing a good work to better a people is the proclaimed goal?

Jealousy, envy, and insecurity will destroy relationships.  These things will cause one to miss (or have delayed) the very blessing sent to them.  In a world where everyone is in need of something, who wants to miss a blessing?  I don’t!

There was a time when I thought people were how they appeared.  Now, I know that people are who they are.  Some will laugh when they find no humor.  Others will not.  Some will wish you well as you leave their presence, and mean it.  Others will not mean it.  Some are consistent with walking and growing in their truth.  Others wrestle with the stagnancy of their lie.  To each, his or her own.  People are who they are.

As for me, the testament to first know, then to accept, and now to embrace the truth of which I am and to which I am of have come with an understanding that Truth is greater than the lie.  Its existence does not have to be defended.  Truth will propel me forward unto new experiences, abundant blessings, and restful sleep.  Truth increases discernment, wisdom, and inner peace.  It establishes trust.

No, it is not always easy to walk in Truth.  Some get nervous when you show up and odd things happen after you leave, but others are comforted.  Be clear about your journey.  Are you on a road less traveled?  Walk in Truth.

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