Excuse Me Little “Black” Girl—Part 1
Excuse Me Little “Black” Girl,
Yes you. I am talking to YOU! I know, I know…. You want to know, “Why?” Believe me when I say, “I understand your skepticism”. I have confidently interrupted you for no reason other than that you are female and black.
Is that a crime?
No…well, some may think so on two counts but in this case NO! To the contrary, I have stopped you to encourage you to continuously set goals and envision achieving the impossible in this crazy world. Its manifestations are indeed possible!
I get it! I GET IT! Achieving goals is hard. No one said it would be easy!
The ability to overcome stereotypes about who you are—or who you are expected to be— combined with societal hindrances, both inter-and-intra-culturally, does not come with a manual. BREATHE! Life is not that easy.
These breaking-barrier conversations, in number and in depth, to obtain guidance are not readily-accessible. We are not mythical, however. Living examples of us are in fact around, but you (and we) are being conditioned to overlook our essence and devalue our worth.
“Your turn will come,” they will say, “after his and hers.” Time does not stop. Remember, “Nothing beats a failure but a try.” Your turn is now, just as his and hers. Truth is, our worth is your worth. Collective value carries weight. It is either relieving or burdensome. Be conscious and careful about what you cart. No one said it would be easy. You must push on and push through. Your dreams will resuscitate you. You will learn to trust that your help, meaning help that is specific to you, will come. Time will teach you to expect and to accept it in whatever form and time it appears. Experience will sharpen your ability to identify it. In turn, you will become aware that you are being shaped to be the help for others of which you seek. It is a process. Excuse me little “Black” girl, you are being transformed.
Allow yourself to learn your SELF. Be patient. This is a never-ending process. It must be embraced with (at times stubborn) determination. Media messages will tell you, and those around you, who you are. Songs and television shows will do the same. Religious interpretations and authority figures will have a say, as will community leaders—if you are mentioned at all. Find appreciation in the knowledge of other’s misperception of you, then confidently introduce yourself.
It was nice meeting you. Now you know WHY.
emergingfree 
Excuse Me Little “Black” Girl—Part 5
A LOLLIPOP GIRL!!!???!!!! My eyes quickly shift to her mother who is obviously mortified. The giggles from the audience ring out. An Around The Way Girl? Returning my attention to the five-year-old, I wonder if she understood the question. There she stands so innocently smiling, ignorant to her naiveté. The teacher is noticeably uncomfortable. She simply asks the next student the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Excuse me little “Black” girl, we need to talk.
What’s going on? No really, what is happening? What messages are you receiving–about yourself, about women, about life? What television shows are you watching? What music do you hear? What conversations do you overhear? What messages fill your head?
When you play, what do you pretend to be? When I was your age, I played with dolls and teddy bears. They were my students. I was the teacher.
What! You don’t play with dolls? Teddy bears neither? Really?
Well, when did that get old?
Let me tell you a story. Last week my assistant told me that every day, several times throughout the day, she sees a woman walking by the window. One day, this woman approached my assistant’s friend and asked to be his lollipop girl. He said, “No.” Then, another man walked by and she asked him the same question. Again and again, she did this–all day, each day. Sometimes she would walk up to men sitting in cars. Sometimes she would get inside the cars, but not long afterwards she would be seen walking down the street. Every man does not say, “No”. The woman, however, always looks really tired. Still, she continues to walk up and down the street like she is on a mission—all day, back and forth, forth and back. She walks. She walks to find a yes, only to walk some more. Does that sound like something you want to do when you grow up?
Listen to me.
Ask your parents to take you to the library. Ask them to check out books for you. Fall in love with books. Look at the pictures. Listen to the stories. Study the letters. Read the words. Understand their arrangement. Books are treasures to be valued.
Allow your mind to crave knowledge. Imagine unwritten success stories about your life. Can’t you see you winning? I can!
There will be times when your feet will hurt. They will feel like you have walked for days. People will see you and know you are on a mission. Along the way, you will hear more noes than you will care to count. Do not become discouraged. The yeses you receive will be well-worth it.
Listen. They say lollipop girls are the world’s oldest professionals. Although that is not true, you will show the world that you are no sucker. Little girl, go get ’em! I’m rooting for you!