It Is Expected
There is something amazingly powerful about standing on grounds where your ancestors are respected. Recently, I took a trip to Georgia. I absolutely love being around my Georgian family. Around them, you know you are with family. There is much laughter and endless love. Conversation is honest. You know you are being watched, but observations are to make sure you are ok…and if you are not, guidance, advice, and encouragement will be rendered. There is no doubt that you are connected and in that linkage you are safe, safe to be great.
I am the great-granddaughter to individuals who helped build an area for the betterment of the community as a whole. They were a part of the first graduating classes, founders, builders, landowners, etc. all the while working to enhance a community along side of others with the same vision, the same goals. When I think of the period in time and what they were able to accomplish, I gain strength in knowing that I am a part of them and they are a part of me.
My ancestors are faith-rooted people, so it is no surprise that I am. They were courageous, as am I. They were visionaries and hard workers. Although I was born after their deaths, I am able to still know them because they left legacies that my current family members openly acknowledge and applaud. They left an expectation for those of us following to build upon and expand. They left their stories and life examples that: the road will not always be easy, the sacrifice will at times be great but to whom much is given, much is expected…and much is expected.
Standing amongst the trees and on roads that saw my ancestors, that heard their voices, and witnessed their work, I felt their connection, their powerful presence. I am reminded that if they could accomplish the visions given to them in the time periods of which they were born, I too can accomplish those given to me in this day and age. After all, it is expected!
What Say You?
Does the rule change when you know of, but have not been raised by both of your living, biological parents?
Imagine a situation where you call your best friend to chit chat about the highlights of your workday and your excitement is met by the sounds of sobs.
“What is wrong,” you ask. Instantly you become protective. Where you are from, friends are family and best friends are siblings—-splitting images.
“I just want to know him,” your friend says.
“Who?”
“My father.”
You are speechless. Should you offer suggestions? Is it best to remain silent? You want to say something, but hesitate.
Truth is, there are a lot of people walking around carrying the pain of not having a healthy relationship with their absentee parent. The question is, whose responsibility is it to make the, most times repeated, effort to establish such relationship (when possible)? Is it enough for the parent to make one or two seemingly failed attempts with the now adult child or is it the child’s duty to seek out the parent? Maybe wanting a healthy relationship is just that, an out of reach hope. For some, this is true. I will acknowledge that, but what about the rest?
Everyone is not faced with this dilemma, but for the numerous individuals who are……what say you?